Friday, March 14, 2008
There's No Turning Back!
If you've seen our Easter video
you will realize that we really do have too much time on our hands, so after we shot this video, we went to a lovely patio bar and got kinda liquored up. What ensued was a discussion about wrinkles...Our examples are the teacher pouch...you know...your teacher in school who always pointed to the blackboard and the under part of her arm flapped around, creating a force of wind that could fan those in the front row. We yukked it up over this one...
Then, our 'bunny' chimed in with her own rendition...and after a coupla more glasses of wine, the most unfairest of wrinkle subjects came up which are the chest wrinkles...and this only happens when you're old enough to actually HAVE cleavage. That is just WRONG!
You yung'uns have so much to look forward to. Actually you do, but this is not part of it. Except if we didn't have wrinkles, what would we laugh about? I mean, besides the extra fat around our middles, the pouches under our eyes, the gray in our hairs, oh, and fat flaps over our knees! YEEHAW! AGING AIN'T FOR PANSIES!
You know what, I'm not even going to try to pretend that the picture of the boobs isn't me because it is. Notice that I have to practically put my elbows together in order to get the boobs close enough together to even make a cleavage. That's because KK and I have never had a cleavage. Well, that's not true we have but our cleavage is about ten inches wide and sort of looks like the back of an alligator head. The skin would be smoother but the eyes sticking up out of the head would be about right.
The Ancient One's boobs are really scary. They hang down over her stomach like two half-filled water balloons hanging down over the side of a hot air balloon. So the hot air balloon would be upside down with the balloons over that if you want a pure visual of Ancient One. And the hot air balloon would be painted like multi-colored flowers because that's her favorite robe.
And notice how in the cleavage picture the little finger on my left hand is bent like a mannequin finger? That started happening about five years ago. It's a good thing I don't play the piano. My career would be over because my finger is permanently in that position. In order to make a 'Q' on my keyboard i have to turn my left hand so that the fingers point directly at the 'g'. Try it and you will see what i mean.
And see the knuckles on the index fingers where they join the palm of the hand? That's arthritis. Your knuckles get really big and look like chestnuts. That didn't really happen to The Ancient One but I'd rather have chestnut hands than elephant ankles which is what she has.
Like I said in my last post...'When you've seen the joke, you've seen the truth. It's okay. KK and I intend to age gracefully with upcoming appointments for botox injections and neck lifts. Did you see my neck wrinkles in that picture. Oh, my god you have to laugh.