Saturday, October 6, 2007

Cooking, Schmooking

I love to eat, as you know, but the cooking part escapes me. SalGal is a fabulous cook, so why should I bother? When I lived in New York, my husband and I went out for practically every meal because he didn't like to cook either. I had a saying taped to our icebox that read, "The modern wife is one who knows what her husband's favorite dishes are and the restaurants that serve them." That seemed logical to me.

When I found myself single again and with a smaller budget for sustanance, I realized that I would have to cook in order to survive. My hands have tiny scars all over them from knife usage. I can't seem to cut lettuce without cutting myself. Even when I'm slicing and dicing and thinking about how careful I need to be with my sharp knife...WHACK...blood, skin, tissue all mixes with the diced celery on the cutting board. I just can't be trusted in the kitchen. This is why the frozen food section at the grocery store is my second home. I know every frozen food dish ever prepared by any manufacturer. They should hire me to do television commercials for them, for God's sake.

Here's the conundrum...I LOVE the cooking channel. I know the Barefoot Contessa, Giada, Bobby Flay and Paula Dean as if they were members of my own family. I watch Top Chef, The Iron Chef and Hell's Kitchen. I am fascinated by cooks and chefs and bakers. I guess it's a vicarious pleasure that draws me to this medium...better THEY in the kitchen than I. I love it when they have all the ingredients that they need in those cute little dishes ready to just plop into their mixtures as they prepare their scrumptious meals. I'll bet the people off camera who have to do all that slicing and dicing have scars on their hands too.

My deal with SalGal is that she cooks, I clean up. That's my kitchen forte. I'm unbelievably talented at soaking, scrubbing, wiping and loading the dishwasher. I believe that the contribution I make in this regard, although unheralded to say the least, is just as valuable as making the mess in the first place. You cooks are all so messy! I know there's a timing thingy, but if you would just clean as you go along, it would make my job a hell of a lot easier. I'm not complaining...ok, maybe I am, but in our house, I am well fed and the kitchen is spotless!

Be kind to your clean-up crew!

1 comment:

Barry Landua said...

Hey Ya'all!!!
I just wanted to test if I can leave a comment since you were unsure if it worked...
I get a kick out of your blog.
Love you tons!