Today's blog is all about driving you to our new video on youtube. It's called, "Because You Never Know." It is 10 minutes long.
Either click on the word video above, or click on the right side of this blog.
This is the first in a series of KK and SalGal videos, so please pass this link on to EVERYone you know so we can become the next Martin and Lewis of youtube!!
Enjoy!
kk
Monday, October 29, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
Bugs and Rodents
How midlifers view creatures:
I don't know anyone who likes roaches. I suggest getting one or more cats for this problem. Whenever you see a roach, all you have to do is call the cats. Of course, they're cats so they may come when you call or they may look at you like, What? I'm busy here. I'm lying in the sun for my naptime, so this better be important. With our herd of cats, it's a matter of decision as to which cat gets the opportunity to pounce on the roach. I can almost see them doing a mental 'rock, paper, scissor' exercise with each other until the winner approaches the roach. I almost feel sorry for the slimy bug, but I also feel a sense of glee knowing that I won't have to smash its guts all over the kitchen floor.
You can leave the cats with the roach and go about your business knowing that when you return, all you will find will be itty bitty roach legs and whiskers. The corpse has been eaten and the cat with the biggest smile on its face is the obvious winner. One bug problem...done!
I have recently been hearing rats in the attic. I know they are rats and not mice because their footsteps sound heavy and mean. I hear them scratching and clawing their way around with great concentration. It was so creepy at first that I had to put a pillow over my ears to sleep. The cats would look up at the ceiling whenever they heard these noises, but it's hard to explain to a cat that there is no way for them to get at the rats due to the stucco and sheet rock of the ceiling. They seem so confused about this that it makes me slap my thigh with laughter.
The Ancient One called the exterminator who showed up yesterday with 12 traps! I don't care how they die, I just want my peaceful sleep back, but I did get a shiver when I saw the torture traps. Ronnie, the rat man, suggested that I might hear a few pops in the middle of the night, but not to worry about it. Don't worry about it? Right...just forget about the movie, Willard, and drift off to sleep...no problem.
Those of you who believe in relocation rather then extermination of rats should skip reading from here.
Sure enough, not only did I hear a popping sound, but then the death rattle and the squirming of tiny rat feet trying to get out of the trap...then silence. I put my headphones on and listened to a meditation tape until I fell asleep (is this a spiritual oxymoron?). And, now all I can picture this morning are the bodies in the traps in the attic. Although I have a soul and believe that the dead rats have now gone to rat heaven, I know that there will be at least a hundred rats coming into the world to replace the few that Ronnie murdered with his traps.
This gives me comfort...?
I say, kill'em all!
kk
********************************************************************
I fuckin' hate bugs. I hate them more than anything. I hate them more than rats and bats and even snakes. Actually, snakes are kind of cool. I have poison ant powder for the back yard, wasp spray for the front porch and Buddy (my cat) for inside the house. I once saw him jump up into the air and catch a fly in mid flight across livingroom. He is awesome at times.
If someone tells me I have a bug on me at a party or something, my arms go flapping, my back arches and my head swings around 180 degrees. I look like some demented ostrich flapping its wings in terror and unable to fly. I'm yelling, ' Get it off, get it off!!' turning my head upside down and shaking my hair to make sure the bug is not there. It just freaks me out. And then I realize what I looked like as I simultaneously see that I am all the way across the yard or room or from wherever the bug was.
When we were young we threw tarantulas at each other and laughed and thought that was hysterical. Once KK chased me around my grandmother's yard with a cicada in her hand. I was traumatized for life. I used to like to sit and look at the praying mantis' in the back yard and I thought they were kind of pretty. Also, mother told me they were good for the garden so I didn't get any wierd feelings about them. Lady bugs are okay, especially the yellow ones. That's it. All other bugs are evil and deserve to die. Scorpions freak me out and so do those black and white boars that live in the big trees and any kind of beetle (except June bugs), cock roaches, termites, etc.
I'm worried about the bees. You know, they think the bees are all dying because they can't find their ways back to the hives any more because of the cell phone towers. The Queen then dies and that's the end of that. Over at the Hula Hut they have a problem with bees outside on the outdoor pier/patio. So they do what lots of people in Texas do and hang big plastic bags full of water from the rafters over the tables. The bees see themselves a thousand times in the water which is like a mirror to them and then they run away and don't bother the diners. If I see bees around I do the ostrich dance then too. They have a tendency to want to dive-bomb me for some reason.
Well, I could go on and on about bugs but that would probably give me nightmares so off I go to water the yard where I have to navigate the spider webs. People here in Austin go all out for Halloween and decorate their houses just like they would for Christmas except with orange and black instead of red and green. They put giant spiders on their front doors and bushes. That's kind of awesome.
SalGal
I don't know anyone who likes roaches. I suggest getting one or more cats for this problem. Whenever you see a roach, all you have to do is call the cats. Of course, they're cats so they may come when you call or they may look at you like, What? I'm busy here. I'm lying in the sun for my naptime, so this better be important. With our herd of cats, it's a matter of decision as to which cat gets the opportunity to pounce on the roach. I can almost see them doing a mental 'rock, paper, scissor' exercise with each other until the winner approaches the roach. I almost feel sorry for the slimy bug, but I also feel a sense of glee knowing that I won't have to smash its guts all over the kitchen floor.
You can leave the cats with the roach and go about your business knowing that when you return, all you will find will be itty bitty roach legs and whiskers. The corpse has been eaten and the cat with the biggest smile on its face is the obvious winner. One bug problem...done!
I have recently been hearing rats in the attic. I know they are rats and not mice because their footsteps sound heavy and mean. I hear them scratching and clawing their way around with great concentration. It was so creepy at first that I had to put a pillow over my ears to sleep. The cats would look up at the ceiling whenever they heard these noises, but it's hard to explain to a cat that there is no way for them to get at the rats due to the stucco and sheet rock of the ceiling. They seem so confused about this that it makes me slap my thigh with laughter.
The Ancient One called the exterminator who showed up yesterday with 12 traps! I don't care how they die, I just want my peaceful sleep back, but I did get a shiver when I saw the torture traps. Ronnie, the rat man, suggested that I might hear a few pops in the middle of the night, but not to worry about it. Don't worry about it? Right...just forget about the movie, Willard, and drift off to sleep...no problem.
Those of you who believe in relocation rather then extermination of rats should skip reading from here.
Sure enough, not only did I hear a popping sound, but then the death rattle and the squirming of tiny rat feet trying to get out of the trap...then silence. I put my headphones on and listened to a meditation tape until I fell asleep (is this a spiritual oxymoron?). And, now all I can picture this morning are the bodies in the traps in the attic. Although I have a soul and believe that the dead rats have now gone to rat heaven, I know that there will be at least a hundred rats coming into the world to replace the few that Ronnie murdered with his traps.
This gives me comfort...?
I say, kill'em all!
kk
********************************************************************
I fuckin' hate bugs. I hate them more than anything. I hate them more than rats and bats and even snakes. Actually, snakes are kind of cool. I have poison ant powder for the back yard, wasp spray for the front porch and Buddy (my cat) for inside the house. I once saw him jump up into the air and catch a fly in mid flight across livingroom. He is awesome at times.
If someone tells me I have a bug on me at a party or something, my arms go flapping, my back arches and my head swings around 180 degrees. I look like some demented ostrich flapping its wings in terror and unable to fly. I'm yelling, ' Get it off, get it off!!' turning my head upside down and shaking my hair to make sure the bug is not there. It just freaks me out. And then I realize what I looked like as I simultaneously see that I am all the way across the yard or room or from wherever the bug was.
When we were young we threw tarantulas at each other and laughed and thought that was hysterical. Once KK chased me around my grandmother's yard with a cicada in her hand. I was traumatized for life. I used to like to sit and look at the praying mantis' in the back yard and I thought they were kind of pretty. Also, mother told me they were good for the garden so I didn't get any wierd feelings about them. Lady bugs are okay, especially the yellow ones. That's it. All other bugs are evil and deserve to die. Scorpions freak me out and so do those black and white boars that live in the big trees and any kind of beetle (except June bugs), cock roaches, termites, etc.
I'm worried about the bees. You know, they think the bees are all dying because they can't find their ways back to the hives any more because of the cell phone towers. The Queen then dies and that's the end of that. Over at the Hula Hut they have a problem with bees outside on the outdoor pier/patio. So they do what lots of people in Texas do and hang big plastic bags full of water from the rafters over the tables. The bees see themselves a thousand times in the water which is like a mirror to them and then they run away and don't bother the diners. If I see bees around I do the ostrich dance then too. They have a tendency to want to dive-bomb me for some reason.
Well, I could go on and on about bugs but that would probably give me nightmares so off I go to water the yard where I have to navigate the spider webs. People here in Austin go all out for Halloween and decorate their houses just like they would for Christmas except with orange and black instead of red and green. They put giant spiders on their front doors and bushes. That's kind of awesome.
SalGal
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Dating
How midlife dating differs:
After a year of being single again, I caved and signed on to an online matchmaking service. I thought the chemistry.com site might work for me because it appears to be for eharmony rejects, and that's a category that fits me like a glove. The five picks that they sent me through that site were really frightening. They either want to read poetry to me or have stomachs so big they haven't seen their toes in years.
I like the new one that I found because you have to be RICH to be a member. Right now, I'm far from rich, but they took me on as part of what they call their "resource database." I think that means that I'm deserving in principle if not pocketbook, so I paid a nominal fee to be one of the hoes in their stable. The rich men, at a 5-figure fee, will walk through the 'stable,' and pick out a thoroughbred...which would be me! The catch is that I don't get to pick them. That's fine too, because I'm way too spooked by this whole thing to click "choose." I figure I'll have better luck if the man decides that my high standards are not too scary for him.
I've tried everything else. SalGal and I have gotten all dolled up on several occasions and gone to bars and parties where we think attractive, middle-aged men might be hangin...with zero results. We either come off as a lesbyterian couple deeply in love with each other or two strong Texas sisters who would mame and torture any man who might be the least bit underqualified for our standards.
At these gatherings it's like we're invisible! I don't get it. Where are all the single, middle-aged, attractive, successful MEN? Are they playing poker with each other or playing polo with their friends? Are they all married? Do they not seek love in their middle-aged years? WHAT?
My matchmakers want to hook me up with a dentist. This is good because my teeth suck, so maybe I can get some good dental care if the love thingy doesn't work out. I'm just afraid he'll ask me to whip out my 'partial' at dinner, then keep my teeth and never call me again!
I'll let you know who comes to my 'stall,' and says, "YES, this is the thoroughbred I'm looking for."
Gulp!
kk
**********************************************************************************
Wow...do you think KK needs a boyfriend or what. Sheesh. I had no idea. When we go out to the bar/restaurnts I'm usually happy to have a drink, talk to her and eat good food. I rarely think about whether men are going to approach us or not. I hope she finds someone good as none of the men she's lived with was good enough for her in my mind. One of them even looked like he had on a Groucho Marks mask. One of them now looks like Igor from 'Young Frankenstien' and one is probably drunk in a cowboy dive in Juarez.
I have had such bad luck with men that I see them as gorillas with dirty underwear, all dressed up and trying to fool me into thinking that they are civilized, but scratching their asses and then smelling their fingers when they get to know you better.
KK assures me that there are good men out there and I know there are. I take full responsibility for the bad choices I've made for men who turn into animals after I've been snared. When I fall in love I fall hard and will do anything including giving up my own personality to please them. That they took full advantage of that and my money is my fault completely and that's why I stay away from them. I like to look at handsome men from afar and imagine that they are loving and nurturing and inspiring and empowering and kind. But my subconscious mind knows that I will pick the gorilla in disguise who is searching for a woman just like I am who will stay with them even after it is revealed that he is grovelling before the porn sites while I'm out trying to generate income to pay the rent. I don't think I will choose him again but I also know you can't decide on with whom you fall in love. So...I play it safe and let KK do the prowl.
SalGal
After a year of being single again, I caved and signed on to an online matchmaking service. I thought the chemistry.com site might work for me because it appears to be for eharmony rejects, and that's a category that fits me like a glove. The five picks that they sent me through that site were really frightening. They either want to read poetry to me or have stomachs so big they haven't seen their toes in years.
I like the new one that I found because you have to be RICH to be a member. Right now, I'm far from rich, but they took me on as part of what they call their "resource database." I think that means that I'm deserving in principle if not pocketbook, so I paid a nominal fee to be one of the hoes in their stable. The rich men, at a 5-figure fee, will walk through the 'stable,' and pick out a thoroughbred...which would be me! The catch is that I don't get to pick them. That's fine too, because I'm way too spooked by this whole thing to click "choose." I figure I'll have better luck if the man decides that my high standards are not too scary for him.
I've tried everything else. SalGal and I have gotten all dolled up on several occasions and gone to bars and parties where we think attractive, middle-aged men might be hangin...with zero results. We either come off as a lesbyterian couple deeply in love with each other or two strong Texas sisters who would mame and torture any man who might be the least bit underqualified for our standards.
At these gatherings it's like we're invisible! I don't get it. Where are all the single, middle-aged, attractive, successful MEN? Are they playing poker with each other or playing polo with their friends? Are they all married? Do they not seek love in their middle-aged years? WHAT?
My matchmakers want to hook me up with a dentist. This is good because my teeth suck, so maybe I can get some good dental care if the love thingy doesn't work out. I'm just afraid he'll ask me to whip out my 'partial' at dinner, then keep my teeth and never call me again!
I'll let you know who comes to my 'stall,' and says, "YES, this is the thoroughbred I'm looking for."
Gulp!
kk
**********************************************************************************
Wow...do you think KK needs a boyfriend or what. Sheesh. I had no idea. When we go out to the bar/restaurnts I'm usually happy to have a drink, talk to her and eat good food. I rarely think about whether men are going to approach us or not. I hope she finds someone good as none of the men she's lived with was good enough for her in my mind. One of them even looked like he had on a Groucho Marks mask. One of them now looks like Igor from 'Young Frankenstien' and one is probably drunk in a cowboy dive in Juarez.
I have had such bad luck with men that I see them as gorillas with dirty underwear, all dressed up and trying to fool me into thinking that they are civilized, but scratching their asses and then smelling their fingers when they get to know you better.
KK assures me that there are good men out there and I know there are. I take full responsibility for the bad choices I've made for men who turn into animals after I've been snared. When I fall in love I fall hard and will do anything including giving up my own personality to please them. That they took full advantage of that and my money is my fault completely and that's why I stay away from them. I like to look at handsome men from afar and imagine that they are loving and nurturing and inspiring and empowering and kind. But my subconscious mind knows that I will pick the gorilla in disguise who is searching for a woman just like I am who will stay with them even after it is revealed that he is grovelling before the porn sites while I'm out trying to generate income to pay the rent. I don't think I will choose him again but I also know you can't decide on with whom you fall in love. So...I play it safe and let KK do the prowl.
SalGal
Monday, October 22, 2007
Midlife Caucusing
Ah...nothing like four days and nights spent with SEVEN of my favorite women who go all the way back with me to elementary school in west Texas! Granted, we look a little different now, but that's just more fodder for all-day conversations about more subjects than are in wikipedia.
Here are some of the topics we covered:
Why bloody marys at 10:15 am are not wrong.
The latest products to soften our feet, soothe our stomachs, hide our spider veins, help us sleep, calm our nerves, attract handsome, middle-aged men, move us toward success, keep our children out of jail, help us care for our ancient parents, smooth our crow's feet, lose our extra pounds, ease the ravages of chemotherapy and keep middle-aged sex fun and productive.
It's only in a group like this that we could laugh as we each try on the wigs that one of us has to use due to a recent diagnosis of breast cancer and a bald head from chemo. We're 'fort' strong in our attempts to comfort and support each other during crises such as illness, failed marriages, children who make us crazy or one who recently passed on to the loving arms of God in heaven. We have insights and wisdom to impart and we talk about things that we could never tell anyone else. We laugh until we cry and we cry until we can't help but laugh.
Our love for each other hurts it's so strong. We feel each other's pains and heartaches and we soar with each other's triumphs. We say ugly things about anyone who has hurt one of our tribe and we plot and scheme about how to get revenge, even as we pray for those who might have wronged us or our children.
When we get together twice a year, we never leave the hostesses house. We stay in our jammies until early afternoon...or all day in some cases. The outside world is not invited, but when you have eight women with eight cell phones, new stories evolve as our loved ones check in to tell us that they have totaled our car, gotten kicked out of their homecoming dance for drinking, had their wife of 6 months lie to them and cheat on them, ask us where the sugar is in the pantry or plead with us to come home and help them with their homework. We rise to these stories as one unit...The Band of Mothers...The Tribe Who Has Spoken. Our families on the outside know that we will not leave the table on the porch until our time together is over, so whatever problems they might have will have to work themselves out via phone calls.
I am honored beyond measure to be included in this group, and my life is enhanced by their warm embraces, their tender smiles and their deep, abiding friendship.
I'll return to my jaded, cynical self tomorrow, but today I am filled with too much love. I want the warm blanket of my friends to stay with me as long as possible before I return to cursing the cable person on the phone because they never showed up.
love,
kk
*******************************************************
That's a really nice post up there, KK. I'm glad you had such a good time with the girls. You told me all of the stories and I believe you hit on all of them in the above blog. Things here were in control and all little problems were taken care of with the utmost maturity and aplomb. It wasn't my fault that I totalled mother's Jazzy Scooter. I was just wheeling down the street at one mile per hour, minding my own business when some asshole in a white pick-up almost ran me over. I had to swerve and it wasn't my fault that the bank of the creek was so steep and rocky. It's a good thing I jumped out of the scooter chair before it careened down the embankment and landed upside down in three feet of water. I tried to pull it out but my efforts only loosened it enough to start it tumbling down the creek and into a six foot deep channel. Do you know how heavy those chairs are? Anyway, I will figure out a way to get it up with a crane or something later. It won't be hard to find as the red light on the arm of the chair is still on and you can see it from the side of the creek.
Look, Buddy saw a squirrel on the deck and when he tried to jump through the sliding screen door it came out of its groove and that is definately not my fault. I figured I could fix it but when I tried to bang it back in with a hammer I accidentally pounded a hole in the screen and bent the frame. Don't worry, we can get a new screen door.
So feel free to go off wiith the girls any time as I am in control here.
I got your back, babe,
SalGal
Here are some of the topics we covered:
Why bloody marys at 10:15 am are not wrong.
The latest products to soften our feet, soothe our stomachs, hide our spider veins, help us sleep, calm our nerves, attract handsome, middle-aged men, move us toward success, keep our children out of jail, help us care for our ancient parents, smooth our crow's feet, lose our extra pounds, ease the ravages of chemotherapy and keep middle-aged sex fun and productive.
It's only in a group like this that we could laugh as we each try on the wigs that one of us has to use due to a recent diagnosis of breast cancer and a bald head from chemo. We're 'fort' strong in our attempts to comfort and support each other during crises such as illness, failed marriages, children who make us crazy or one who recently passed on to the loving arms of God in heaven. We have insights and wisdom to impart and we talk about things that we could never tell anyone else. We laugh until we cry and we cry until we can't help but laugh.
Our love for each other hurts it's so strong. We feel each other's pains and heartaches and we soar with each other's triumphs. We say ugly things about anyone who has hurt one of our tribe and we plot and scheme about how to get revenge, even as we pray for those who might have wronged us or our children.
When we get together twice a year, we never leave the hostesses house. We stay in our jammies until early afternoon...or all day in some cases. The outside world is not invited, but when you have eight women with eight cell phones, new stories evolve as our loved ones check in to tell us that they have totaled our car, gotten kicked out of their homecoming dance for drinking, had their wife of 6 months lie to them and cheat on them, ask us where the sugar is in the pantry or plead with us to come home and help them with their homework. We rise to these stories as one unit...The Band of Mothers...The Tribe Who Has Spoken. Our families on the outside know that we will not leave the table on the porch until our time together is over, so whatever problems they might have will have to work themselves out via phone calls.
I am honored beyond measure to be included in this group, and my life is enhanced by their warm embraces, their tender smiles and their deep, abiding friendship.
I'll return to my jaded, cynical self tomorrow, but today I am filled with too much love. I want the warm blanket of my friends to stay with me as long as possible before I return to cursing the cable person on the phone because they never showed up.
love,
kk
*******************************************************
That's a really nice post up there, KK. I'm glad you had such a good time with the girls. You told me all of the stories and I believe you hit on all of them in the above blog. Things here were in control and all little problems were taken care of with the utmost maturity and aplomb. It wasn't my fault that I totalled mother's Jazzy Scooter. I was just wheeling down the street at one mile per hour, minding my own business when some asshole in a white pick-up almost ran me over. I had to swerve and it wasn't my fault that the bank of the creek was so steep and rocky. It's a good thing I jumped out of the scooter chair before it careened down the embankment and landed upside down in three feet of water. I tried to pull it out but my efforts only loosened it enough to start it tumbling down the creek and into a six foot deep channel. Do you know how heavy those chairs are? Anyway, I will figure out a way to get it up with a crane or something later. It won't be hard to find as the red light on the arm of the chair is still on and you can see it from the side of the creek.
Look, Buddy saw a squirrel on the deck and when he tried to jump through the sliding screen door it came out of its groove and that is definately not my fault. I figured I could fix it but when I tried to bang it back in with a hammer I accidentally pounded a hole in the screen and bent the frame. Don't worry, we can get a new screen door.
So feel free to go off wiith the girls any time as I am in control here.
I got your back, babe,
SalGal
Saturday, October 20, 2007
Character Development on KK and SalGal
KK is still at some ranch in the middle of Texas with her highschool girlfriends, drinking and partying and having a good time, I hope. The Ancient One and I have commented that it feels like there is nothing happening here.
I miss her comtrails as she jets from kitchen to laundry room to livingroom to bedroom to office computer and back again. She is always a whirlwind of activity and 'chores' as she calls them. I am usually having my first cup of coffee as she finishes the laundry, her blog comments, one hour of meditation, feeding the cats, doing her morning affirmations and then bathroom time preening which generally takes her forever. Just as I'm ready to make mine and the Ancient One's breakfast and get another cup of coffee, KK is out the door to do her errands and looking like a movie star on her way to lunch at The Ivy. Mother just looks at the screen door as it shuts and goes, 'whew'. By then it's 8:30 in the morning and I'm exhausted just from trying to figure out where the hell she is going. She wakes up in the dark for God's sake.
I always try to get presentable before she gets back but that's only out of embarrassment. While KK is like a worker ant that can lift ten times her weight to take food back to the hill, I am the dung beetle trying to dig a nest into a pile of water buffalo shit so a lemur won't eat me.
I'm missing my sister and her sharp wit and willingness to call Time Warner and other such companies that have automated answering machines. I think the cats miss her but it's hard to tell with them. The Ancient one is happy as long as Fox News is on and 'Boston Legal' is recorded on the DVR.
I bet you miss her too,
SalGal
I miss her comtrails as she jets from kitchen to laundry room to livingroom to bedroom to office computer and back again. She is always a whirlwind of activity and 'chores' as she calls them. I am usually having my first cup of coffee as she finishes the laundry, her blog comments, one hour of meditation, feeding the cats, doing her morning affirmations and then bathroom time preening which generally takes her forever. Just as I'm ready to make mine and the Ancient One's breakfast and get another cup of coffee, KK is out the door to do her errands and looking like a movie star on her way to lunch at The Ivy. Mother just looks at the screen door as it shuts and goes, 'whew'. By then it's 8:30 in the morning and I'm exhausted just from trying to figure out where the hell she is going. She wakes up in the dark for God's sake.
I always try to get presentable before she gets back but that's only out of embarrassment. While KK is like a worker ant that can lift ten times her weight to take food back to the hill, I am the dung beetle trying to dig a nest into a pile of water buffalo shit so a lemur won't eat me.
I'm missing my sister and her sharp wit and willingness to call Time Warner and other such companies that have automated answering machines. I think the cats miss her but it's hard to tell with them. The Ancient one is happy as long as Fox News is on and 'Boston Legal' is recorded on the DVR.
I bet you miss her too,
SalGal
Friday, October 19, 2007
My Audition
My agent called about two weeks ago and sent me to an audition for a $145 million dollar movie with two huge stars and a director who was nominated for an academy award about two years ago, very famous. I thought I did a good audition and I got to sing and cry and everything. For those of you who don't know how the audition thing works, if you are in the running for a role you get a 'callback'. For episodics on television it happens very quickly within days. For feature films it can go on for months. I got a callback and went to the second audition on Tuesday. I think I nailed it.
Can you imagine how excited I am? Well, I'm nervous enough to catch a hummingbird.
There have been times when I was in a commercial audition having to act like a chicken or yelling 'booya!' at a can of chili and thinking...'I go to my acting class every fucking week, teach actors and study my ass off constantly doing monologues and reading books on acting and mentoring actors in Hollywood and I'm standing here doing this shit? Jesus.' It's a wierd life, being an actor.
We love it though and we can't help it.
And by the way, I do a great chicken.
SalGal
Can you imagine how excited I am? Well, I'm nervous enough to catch a hummingbird.
There have been times when I was in a commercial audition having to act like a chicken or yelling 'booya!' at a can of chili and thinking...'I go to my acting class every fucking week, teach actors and study my ass off constantly doing monologues and reading books on acting and mentoring actors in Hollywood and I'm standing here doing this shit? Jesus.' It's a wierd life, being an actor.
We love it though and we can't help it.
And by the way, I do a great chicken.
SalGal
Thursday, October 18, 2007
KK's Absence
My sweet KK is off to another one of her girlfriend weekends and I'm alone with the ancient one. KK still has girlfriends from highschool and they get together for weekend partying regularly. This time they are all meeting at a ranch somewhere in the middle of Texas. They drink and cook and smoke and talk and talk and talk.
THINGS I'M GOING TO DO WHILE KK IS GONE:
Leave dishes in the sink
Feed the cats too much (not on purpose)
Watch scary movies on TV
Wake up late
Take a nap on her bed
Try on her clothes
Wear her shoes with the white bows on them
Eat pork rhinds
Sing out loud while on the computer
Play Jewel Quest with the sound on
Let the cats play in the garage
Use her fancy soap
Let mother have everything with butter on it
Drink bourbon
Ride down the block in the ancient one's Jazzy Scooter
These are all things that KK cautions me about. Nyuck, nyuck. I will of course hide all of the evidence before she gets back on Sunday and all will look normal except mother and the cats will be fatter.
When the cat's away, the mice will play,
SalGal
THINGS I'M GOING TO DO WHILE KK IS GONE:
Leave dishes in the sink
Feed the cats too much (not on purpose)
Watch scary movies on TV
Wake up late
Take a nap on her bed
Try on her clothes
Wear her shoes with the white bows on them
Eat pork rhinds
Sing out loud while on the computer
Play Jewel Quest with the sound on
Let the cats play in the garage
Use her fancy soap
Let mother have everything with butter on it
Drink bourbon
Ride down the block in the ancient one's Jazzy Scooter
These are all things that KK cautions me about. Nyuck, nyuck. I will of course hide all of the evidence before she gets back on Sunday and all will look normal except mother and the cats will be fatter.
When the cat's away, the mice will play,
SalGal
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